THE X-FILES
SPIN-OFF SPECIAL
 As
has been widely reported throughout the media over the
last few weeks, it’s almost certain that David
Duchovny will not sign on for another season of The
X-Files. Aside from the fact that the show is unlikely
to prosper without him, creator/producer Chris Carter,
and Gillian Anderson have also gone on record in the
last week to express their doubts about continuing with
the show. Suffice to say, this leaves X-Files fans
around the world feeling distraught and helpless at the
thought of being left to drift without the rudder which
steers them through life.
Bubblegun
says this: All is not lost! The X-Files can thrive and
prosper, its format flexible enough to be bent in any
one of several directions. Observe now, as we present
Bubblegun’s proposals for four potential X-Files
spin-offs. Rest assured, we shall be forwarding these
excellent ideas to the programme makers at 20th Century
Fox...
PROPOSAL
#1 - THE LONE GUNMEN
Follows
the adventures of The Lone Gunmen, the three geek
conspiracy theorists who Mulder has often turned to for
help. They run a paranoid newspaper entitled The Magic
Bullet, and their investigations would provide an
excellent basis for an ongoing series. Already The Lone
Gunmen have had two standalone X-Files episodes to
themselves, proving their characters strong enough to
support a show of their own. We suggest a story arc with
the Gunmen investigating the mysterious disappearances
of Mulder and Scully - who could themselves be found
just in time for the second X-Files movie.
PROPOSAL
# 2 - KRYCHEK AND COMPANY
Upon
moving to a cramped downtown apartment in New York, the
enigmatic Alex Krychek, right-hand, one-armed henchman
for a race of would-be alien invaders, encounters a
bizarre assortment of characters - with hilarious
consequences! The half-hour feel-good situation comedy
show would concern itself with Krychek and his
associates; Brian the half-human government lackey who
lives in the apartment down the hall, “Fox” the
paranoid conspiracy theorist from the apartment across
the hall who wants to know just what Alex “is up to in
there”, Mr Well-Manicured-Man - Krychek’s
straight-laced employer, and Maria - Krychek’s
scatterbrained would-be girlfriend with crazy plans for
saving the world from alien domination. Each show would
be book-ended by a monologue from Alex, as he muses on
life’s many quirks.
PROPOSAL
#3 - A.D. SKINNER
A
hilarious animated series, in which the Assistant
Director Skinner, sick of the killing and the
double-talk, leaves his post in the FBI for a new job -
as principal of Springfield Elementary School! Skinner
is forced to move back home to live with his mother, but
he hadn’t reckoned on a certain little boy called Bart
Simpson! The barrel-chested miserablist works hard at
his job, but a combination of Bart’s misbehaviour, and
his own incompetence, gets him into regular trouble with
Superintendent Chalmers - with hilarious consequences!
“Skiiinerrrrr!!!”
PROPOSAL
#4 - CANCERMAN & SON
Having
left the global organisation bent on dominating the
world with its plans to pervert the human genome with an
alien DNA virus, the mysterious Cancerman buys himself a
scrapyard where he can earn a bit of dough while he
writes the great American novel. When his
good-for-nothing son, Agent Spender (Jimmy Nail), comes
a-knocking, Cancerman feels obliged to give him a bed,
but only on the condition that he help out in the
scrapyard - with hilarious consequences! Spender’s
love of loud rock music and partying on down is a
constant source of interruption for his stressed father.
In the first episode, Cancerman hires a hitman to shoot
his son in the back of the head - with further hilarious
consequences etc...
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